Best Funny Inspirational Retirement Quotes

There’s no one on this planet that is going to argue that planning for retirement isn’t serious business. Making your will, creating your estate plan, keeping up with Medicare deadlines, deciding when to take Social Security, or weighing whether reversing mortgage would help you achieve a better retirement. This would give anybody over the age of 60 a lot to think about. It’s time to put those cumbersome decisions behind you and take a glance at these retirement quotes and sayings to add to a card, gift, or just for your enjoyment.

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Funny Retirement Quotes

1. Retirement is just a endless vacation, enjoy it.
2. Now Fridays won’t be the best day of the week anymore… cause they all are!
3. Think about retirement as a two six-month holidays annually.
4. The most advantageous part about retirement is that you don’t have to bother about getting caught for doing nothing.
5. Retirement is like returning home one day and telling your wife, sweetheart, I’m home… for good!
6. When is the bedtime of a retiree? About 20 minutes after they fall asleep on the couch.
7. I don’t reveal my age, but I do tell people I’m retired. They can decipher my age from that statement.
8. When do you know it’s time to retire? It’s when you stop lying and start bragging about your age!
9. I love being a retired grandparent. I just give my grandkids lots of sugar and then leave them to their parents to deal with.
10. Why do retirees careless about being called seniors? Because the tag comes with a 10% discount.
11. Why do retirees smile every time? Because they can’t hear anything you are saying!
12. I wish I could divulge my age, but I just can’t. It just keeps changing all the time.
13. Immediately after the wife thinks she’s gotten rid of their kids from living in the house, the husband decided to retire.
14. During your career life, you’d pick up a lot of bad habits… like working.
15. The longest coffee break in the world is often referred to as retirement.

Inspirational Retirement Quotes

1. The most advantageous part about retirement is spending time with the grandkids.
2. Retirement is that of your life when time no longer equals money.
3. Retire from the job, but never retire your mind.
4. Your best days in retirement are when you give back to the community.
5. You don’t stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing.
6. Age is nothing but a number, but retirement is one of the greatest gifts to humanity.
7. Retirement isn’t the end of the road, but just a right turn in the journey.
8. Retirement is the time to enjoy those things you couldn’t have before.
9. We really live two lives. The first one and then the second life when we realize we have only one life.
10. You have to keep out being young until you retire.

Retirement Wishes for Card

1. The most advantageous part about being retired is never having to ask for time off. Congratulations!
2. Wishing you the greatest retirement ever! Enjoy this new chapter of your life and enjoy being the boss of you.
3. Congrats on being extremely tired that you needed to retire.
4. Enjoy your newly discovered weekends which will last 7 days!
5. Enjoy being the master of precisely nothing.
6. Say goodbye to work tension and hello to your pension.
7. Enjoy working at living, as opposed to living at work.
8. Enjoy your endless new vacation.
9. Go make the very most of your days while enjoying your retirement
10. I’m very jealous of you, though unnecessary to say, I’m happy for your retirement
11. Wishing you an amazing retirement!
12. We wish you the greatest retirement possible.
13. It’s time to work on your golf strokes, enjoy your retirement!
14. Hoping you enjoy your retirement!
15. Although we envy you, but are thrilled for you!

Happy Retirement Wishes from Company

1. It’s been amazing working with you. Here’s to a well-deserved and joy filled retirement.
2. All the best on your untimely retirement!
3. Just imagine, you’ll never have the compulsion to sit in on another conference call. Enjoy your retirement!
4. It’s with regret I say goodbye, but amazing to see you are on your way to greener pastures.
5. You are a genuine friend and an extremely hard worker. Thank you for all your years at this company.
6. You will be greatly missed. Thank you for everything you’ve done.
7. Welcome to your newfound freedom called retirement!
8. Enjoy being the CEO of your retirement!
9. We pray your retirement is filled with love, joy, and laughter.
10. You’ve worked your whole career for this very moment… enjoy your retirement!
11. You will always be in our minds for your hard work throughout the years. Thank you for your commitment to the team. Enjoy your retirement!
12. Congratulations on retiring! Although the money isn’t better in retirement, the hours surely are.
13. We wish you a great time off.
14. Congratulations on being unable to have to call in sick again.
15. Best of luck with retiring!

Teacher Retirement Quotes

1. Thank you for being such an awesome teacher over the years! You will be deeply missed.
2. We have learned a lot because of you.
3. You’ve always encouraged us to be the best variant of ourselves.
4. Enjoy your retirement! We wish you’d continue to tutor in ways outside the classroom.
5. Congratulations on your retirement! Thank you for tutoring so many people.
6. In great appreciation for all of your year’s teaching, we all would like to say thank you for your skill and dedication.

What is a great retirement saying?

Use one of our multiple quotes from this article or say something witty like “Retire from the job, but never retire your mind.”

How do you tell someone a happy retirement?

Use one of our multiple quotes from this article or say something like “Praying you to have the greatest retirement ever! Enjoy this new chapter of your life and enjoy being your own boss.”